Find the FUN in Parenting
Can you really have FUN with and be friends with your kids? Yes, absolutely!!! The secret is to find the balance between FUN and discipline. Once you have that figured out you will sail through the younger years with your children and sail through (okay, maybe not sail through, but certainly find them easier) the teen years. My parenting philosophy is based on my belief and experience that raising children should be FUN,and that’s what I want for you too.
The above is the new intro on my Website Home Page. I’ve sort of stayed in the closet when it comes to talking about all the fun I had parenting my own 2 kids. The reason is I’m afraid of making other parents feel bad if they’re struggling and not wallowing in parenting. I agree that parenting is difficult and often painful, that’s the norm. But the reality is … gulp … I loved parenting and found it quite easy. There, I said it. My kids weren’t perfect, and neither am I, they’ll happily attest to my imperfections. But I had an edge in that I was very tough re. discipline when they were younger so that I could just sail through about the next 12 years until they hit the teen years when I had to sort of remind them to be considerate and respectful at times. Those early years really cemented our relationship which was built on a strong foundation of discipline and tons and tons of laughter and fun. It’s hard to enjoy kids who are out of control, but it’s pure joy when they’re well behaved and fun to be around.
I’ve written this many times and deleted it as don’t want to sound like I’m bragging or make parents who are struggling feel bad. But by finally (hope I don’t delete it again) admitting to how easy and fun I found parenting I hope to give you hope. Parenting really can be fun, but you have to be willing to be the bad guy, the disciplinarian, the heavy first. I was proud of how tough I was, never for 1 second thought that being tough was wrong as I knew it was for their own good … and my sanity. Get that out of the way then just relax and enjoy.
Sure, you can pay me to coach you through this, and I hope you do. But if you don’t, just give it some thought. If you were a kid/teen, wouldn’t you want to please a parent who is predictable, structured, reliable, and really easy to make laugh and have fun with? Imagine how you’d feel being around someone who makes you feel good about yourself because you’re well behaved and also lots of fun to be around. Self-esteem sky rockets, and so would your behaviour and attitude toward others. Wouldn’t you also want to please that parent and never disappoint them? It’s a win-win formula.
Please don’t feel you’re doing it all wrong because you don’t wallow in parenting. Few do. I certainly don’t wallow in many things, only parenting, which is why I’m doing this for a living now. It’s just my “calling” if you will. I’m terrible at so many things, just happen to have felt right at home mothering. The hard part for me at this point in my life is that that stage of my life is over and done :(. I miss those years yet am so proud of who my kids have become. They’re mature, kind, responsible, honest and both really fun to be around. They just don’t need me like they used to and I’ll get used to that … one day I’m sure. It’s just another stage of parenting, i.e., letting go. This is, by far, my biggest parenting challenge.