Parenting CAN be Fun & Easy

Parenting can be fun and easy.  I loved, it.  It was the best time of my life as those little people provided me with so much joy and laughter.  I even enjoyed disciplining as I came up with punishments that were funny, well, to me.

One of my favourites was “Mom Makeover”.   What teenage boy wants to be putting make-up on his mother?  I’d say, “It’s either a one day ban on video games or a 30 minute Mom Makeover, your choice.”

The goal is to only have to discipline on rare occasions.  You want your children to be self-disciplining and accountable for their actions.

The biggest problem I see with kids lately is “Self-Entitlement-itis”.  They’ve been so spoiled and gotten away with so much that they expect that to continue when they’re out in the real world.  It’s quite the slap in the face when they realize that’s not the case.

Parenting sessions may be for you.

Happy Parenting,

Lisa

Why my Kids were never Bullied

My kids were on the sensitive side so I was worried about them being victims once they hit the school years.  I pumped them full of confidence by disciplining them … and having tons of fun with them.

In the really early years I’d sometimes wonder if I wasn’t too much of a clown, but they were good kids, so I just relaxed and wallowed in them … it was the best time of my life.

They felt so valued with all the laughter in the house and proud of themselves for being nice that their self-esteem was through the roof.

Kids who act out always have low self-esteem.  They just instinctively know they’re not acting in an impressive manner and feel a sense of shame.  They may exhibit bravado, but they don’t have high self-esteem.

Deflecting: The best defence against bullying is indifference. Ignoring can antagonize a bully just as much as fighting back. And don’t be tempted to tell your children to fight back as the bully often has more experience with fighting and doesn’t always back down. Besides, that can lead to it seeming like 2 kids fighting rather than there being one bully and one victim.

Indifference is best practised at home with role playing. Indifference is very hard to pull off when they’re upset which is why practising at home with you over and over again will help them feign indifference with the real bully.

I was only bullied once and I think I was in grade 2. Some older kid made fun of my last name and I had a funnier way of saying it which threw them right off so they moved onto someone else to bully.

Children who grow up with discipline turn into self-disciplined adults.  

If you’d like help with this.

Happy Parenting,

Lisa 

 

Stop Killing your Child’s Confidence with too much Praise | Parenting

Over praising children is just as bad as under praising them. 

Kids have great crap detectors, they know when they’re being patronized.

I’m not a fan of participation awards.  They  don’t prepare children for the real world.  Can you imagine turning up to a race and getting an award for just turning up?  How dumb is that?

This over praising trend partnered with spoiling is what’s contributing to the epidemic of the self-entitled generation.

Self-entitled youths don’t cope well in the real world.  They often struggle with depression once they realize the whole world isn’t going to praise and pay them for nothing more than breathing.

The best thing you can do for your children is to teach them to be kind, grateful and accountable.  

Praise kindness

Reinforce gratefulness

Teach accountability

 

The first 2 are pretty self-explanatory but if you want to know more about teaching accountability, I have a FREE behaviour system to help you get started.

Happy Parenting,

Lisa

 

 

Top 3 Tips to Keep a House Clean with Kids | Parenting

My top 3 tips to keep your house clean with kids are:

1)  Food stays at the table

Many visiting kids have a terrible time with my food rules as they’re used to just walking around with food in their hands at home.  I’m in an awkward position as don’t want to embarrass their parents but I’m also very house proud and don’t appreciate peanut butter smeared on my couch, chocolate on my curtains, etc.  

The parents will try to keep their kids at the table and I’ll maybe say something like, “If they’re hungry, they’ll sit.  Just push their plate out of reach so they can’t grab the food and run.”  The parents will sort of try but will usually give in to keep the peace and I’ll be left to clean all sorts of gross messes after they leave.  I’d much rather watch their kid tantrum than walk around my home smearing and dropping food everywhere … ugh.  

Those parents usually have lots of mealtime struggles obviously.  When my kids were little people would say, “You’re so lucky your kids enjoy sitting and eating at the table.”  There was no luck involved, they just didn’t have a choice.  You either eat at the table or you don’t eat.  If you get up before you’re done, the food is gone.  They never challenged it as never knew any different.

2)  No shoes in the house

This one’s a no-brainer.  You’re obviously going to have a cleaner house if you take off your shoes at the door.  This is particularly important with kids as they have their feet up on furniture, walls, wherever.

I had a neighbour who had shoe prints on her walls as said her kids liked to lay down and climb the wall with their feet.

Those same kids liked to run around naked.  I made the mistake of sitting on their couch after the toddler had just done a poop on his own with no toilet paper.  Needless to say I had to put a blanket down on my car seat before driving home and racing in the house to rip my clothes off and burn them, lol.

Why those kids loved running around naked with with their shoes on I’ll never know?

3)  Set up a Toy Rotation System

My kids rarely complained about being bored yet had very few toys out at once.  The secret was that everything was rotated so when they’d get the new box full of old stuff it seemed new to them.

More on how to set this up.

Clutter is overwhelming for kids.  They can’t concentrate on anything when everything is in front of them.

Obviously kids are going to make some mess but you can still keep a clean home and have kids you’re proud to take anywhere.

Do you have any tips you can share?

Happy Parenting,

Lisa.

 

 

 

Co-sleeping & Breastfeeding in Public

Is it okay to co-sleep with your kids?  Does it matter?  I mean, is it a big deal?  No, it’s just personal preference.

Maybe there’s some medical warnings about rolling onto and smothering your kids but that’s pretty rare.

We co-slept with our daughter until she was 8 months old.  The only reason we did that was because she was so cuddly and just wanted to be held all night … ugh.

I don’t think either of us got a decent night’s sleep for those 8 months but she was happy so that’s all that matters … I guess.

I don’t understand why co-sleeping is such a heated topic?  It’s like breastfeeding in public.  Really?  Is that a big deal?

Except maybe extreme breastfeeding.  This just gives me the creeps.

So if you’re co-sleeping or public breastfeeding and someone tries to tell you it’s wrong, just smile and nod.  It’ll drive them nuts and shut them right up.

Happy Parenting,

Lisa